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She works out a lot by her own admission (and judging by her track record in this department) and often meets partners at the gym, not the bars.
Winter tells Web MD that she and her co-author interviewed more than 200 couples for their book. Such men (at least the ones interested in older women) are stable and mature. They want a woman who knows who she is." Still, even Winter admits, this may not be for everyone.
Tessina, Ph D, a licensed family therapist in practice in Long Beach, Calif., and author of The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again, tells Web MD.
For their part, the men like the sophistication and life success of their older mates, she explains.
She, on the other hand, may already be settled, financially secure, maybe even a mother. But, if you are living a different lifestyle to the person you’re dating, it will likely lead to conflict.
Try to establish what you’re both looking for from the relationship in the early days, so you can be sure you’re on the same page.
"What you don't want," she explains, "is one partner wanting to go out, the other stay in; one willing to talk, the other wanting space (and silence to enjoy it)." Susan Winter is co-author, with Felicia Brings, of Older Women, Younger Men: New Options for Love and Romance.
Similarly, if you dream of having children of your own, she may not want to revisit that part of her life or you might need to move faster than you’d like to ensure the best chances of success.
Braving "robbing the cradle" jokes, almost one-third of women between ages 40 and 69 are dating younger men (defined as 10 or more years younger).
According to a recent AARP poll, one-sixth of women in their 50s, in fact, prefer men in their 40s.
Take time to be clear about what you want from a long-term relationship and check that your values are aligned. Women reach their sexual peak later in life than men, so an older woman and younger man may find that they’re perfectly in sync.
Older women know what they want so be prepared for her to tell you – relinquish control and go with it.